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Mediocre Fiction is Just a Click Away!

Pictured above is a set of postcards by acclaimed Japanese artist Yoshitomo Nara I was given this past holiday by some friends. They are lovely, and I enjoy them greatly.

But postcards are made for sending!  And though it is not without some hesitation, sometimes we have to sacrifice in the name of art.

So!  The first ten people who hit me up and send me an address will get one of my Nara postcards, with a handwritten flash fiction written on the back. The idea is that the expectation of others will actually get me to finish something and get the momentum building again.

Only requests submitted through the contact page will be accepted.  Do not hit me up via Twitter, do not ask me in real life.  Only via the contact page, first come first serve.

You’re just a few clicks away from the seventh greatest 100-word-or-less story you’ve ever read!  Get yours today!

Chubby Chasing with RadioPFG!

You know what I miss, friends? Fat rappers! They used to be everywhere, now you never see them. If only there was some way I could educate you on what made them so wonderful. Oh right, I have a podcast! With links for you to learn even more!
The Fat Boys
Biz Markie
Chubb Rock
Heavy D
PM Dawn
Big Punisher
Cee-Lo Green
Fat Joe
Notorious B.I.G.
Rick Ross

In a programming note, it should be mentioned I snafu’d during one of my segments: Chubb Rock’s album ‘The One’ dropped in 1989, not 1999.

 

And because I said I refuse to suffer alone, behold the misconceived stunt rapper from the mind of Arsenio Hall, Chunky A.

 

You can’t unsee that shit, friends.

And Now, Because You’ve All Been Bad

Truth in Advertising

A new episode of RadioPFG, honouring not only Nate Dogg, who we lost this week, but some true school classics by Canadian artists.  That graphic says it all, I think.  Shirts featuring that image in a variety of colourways can be purchased here, if you’re so inclined, show your support.

If you make it through the whole thing, you’ll notice some requests I made near the show’s conclusion, and I’m totally serious about it.  If you have music you’d like me to put on, if you want to take a stab at scratching out a theme for the show, or if you’d like to just hear your voice on it by recording a drop, you can get all of those to me by emailing them.  While I certainly have no problem blathering half-mindlessly into the dead space of the airwaves [as evidenced by this particular episode, the first that I didn’t write myself a script for, and it shooows], I would love to hear from people who like what I’m doing.

LINKS!
Nate Dogg
Shade Sheist
Brassmunk
Kardinal Offishal
Len
Ghetto Concept
Mathematik
Da Grassroots
Tone Mason

Drifting Away Like a Feather in Air

The Man of the Hour. Rest in Peace.

“You sound like a guy talking to himself in a basement apartment.”
“But that’s what I am.”
“That’s not what I mean.  I know how much this means to you, I know how passionate you are about it, but it doesn’t sound like it comes across.  You’re sort of doing all the things you hate about college radio.”

She had a point. She still does.  I’m still working out the kinks in my delivery, maybe a permanent sidekick/cohost is in order, I don’t know.

So the vocal delivery is still a little stiff, and I sound a little croaky after my party weekend, but I had to get my ass in gear or I would have sat with it for another week.

So here you are, episode two of RadioPFG! Now with links!

Nujabes/Hydeout Productions [Japanese]
Five Deez
Pase Rock
Substantial
L-Universe [Japanese]
Funky DL
Samurai Champloo
Eternal Soul [short documentary on Nujabes]

Love letters or hate mail welcomed through the usual channels. Please to enjoy.

All the Way Live

Would a face like this ever lie to you?

It’s not perfect, but I had to stop myself from chasing perfection lest another week go by without posting.  Besides, I’ll always know where I had to chop the audio, and how many takes I cut in my living room until I’m sure my upstairs neighbours couldn’t stand the sound of my voice leaking through the floorboards anymore, but you never will.

So behold!  The premiere episode of RadioPFG is here!

I have no idea what the show will turn into. I have a rough idea for the second episode that will closely mimic the first, but after that, things will be more fast and loose.  Episode 3 may be ten minutes long with no music, depends how I’m feeling.  What I do know is that the best podcasts are conversations.  As such, hate mail and love letters are always welcomed through the usual channels.

Links to what you’ll hear on the podcast:
The Big L/Jay-Z freestyle session on Stretch&Bobbito.
Hydeout Productions [Nujabes]
Uyama Hiroto
Nomak
Freddie Gibbs
CYNE
The Roots
Q-Tip
Teriyaki Boyz
Freddie Joachim

You can download the episode on the show page, or should you prefer, you can just listen to it in the embedded player below. Please to enjoy, and don’t judge me too harshly.

Thank You for Holding

Okay, so not so much technical difficulties as an afternoon spent on some housekeeping issues in an attempt to streamline the PFG experience, since I don’t have anyone to do it for me.

If you would direct your attention to the menu at the top of the screen, you will notice that one of those drop-down menus actually…drops down.

Where previously a click of the ‘Works’ tab would ultimately take you to a PDF of the work in question, those PDFs have now been given their own dedicated page here on the site, unless it requires  you to go to another site altogether.  Just trying to make it easier for the curious to connect with what I do, since I think it’s been forgotten that this was once upon a time the blog was supposed to complement the creative work and not the other way around.

So click away, friends.

Some Thing I Wrote for Some Girl

Weightless

If songs could capture
the wonder of your smile, glowing
like a coastal sunset, all peaches and pinks,

I would not write them.

My love cannot fly to you on gusts of melody.
It huffs along prosaic tracks,
heaving clumsily and out of breath,
gasping to tell you–

No music could lift something so substantial
to an appropriate height.
So let it stay anchored,
solid like your hand wrapped in mine,
a fleshy mitten for the coming winter.

If you can find happiness while earthbound,
I promise we will dance across the ballroom
of our lives, the years sweeping
behind us in an elegant arc,

your laughter in my ears
the only sonata
I will ever need.

9.24.09

***

Be sure to also check out ‘The Coach’, another oldie added to the ‘Works’ page in the Journalism section.